Tampon commercials are sexy

Last night Conor and I partook in one of televisions finest events ever- elimidate. It was probably the best episode of all time.. Conor was the name of the guy in the show and he had three less than classy ladies entertaining him. This guy played it great. All he did was compare the girls and get them to settle all his choices. He basically got them to vote on the eliminations. The first girl got eliminated for being "orange", they called her radioactive skin. Three of the girls teamed up against one girl who was given up by her mom at five to an aunt, who then got a boyfriend and gave her up to her grandma who died and gave her up for adoption and so she was viciously attacked for being unlovable and worthless. Anything this girls said was rebuked with "but your mom doesnt love you" and "you dont even have a mommy and daddy". When radioactive orange was gone she says in her cut away "its okay he didnt have muscles anyway." This leaves the other two girls to team up against another girl who claimed she was more mature than the other two, the meanest girl then replied "if by mature you mean having a baby", she had a kid. The mother than says she has been going to bars since she was 12 and "these girls couldnt even get 10 year old boyfriends when they were 12 and I was dating 25 years olds then." So at this point the mother takes the guy and gives him a huge french kiss, then the vicious girl steps up and gives him and even deeper one, so dude says to the last girl "so are you going to step up" so she leans in and gives him some loving. Conor makes out with 3 girls in less than a minute and then says "there is enough of the Conor to go around". The loveless girl also says that "last is best ??? In the next elimination Conor gets rid of the mother by saying "it makes me uncomfortable having to think about meeting your kid." This pisses her off and she says something to Conor who replies "get the fuck outa here." With only the loveless girl and the vicious barbie doll collector left the dance floor seems like a great place for Conor to be - both girls fight to make out with him dancing. So down to the final elimination and Conor says to vicious "I cant believe how malicious you have been tonight to this girl over something she had no control over" turning to loveless "but I dont know how you didnt stand up for yourself, I like a girl with a spine" and the deciding factor is -- "I guess in the end I have to go with 'vicious' because you just have to much family baggage." Holly shit, I cant believe what just happened there. I wrote this all down so the quotes are acurate. Conor imediately starts making out with vicious as soon as loveless is out of the picture.

Conor and I thought a great episode of elimidate would be Conor, myself, Eric and a Jewish guy on a date with some ditzy blond. Eric would just keep telling the girl that Conor and I dont make as much money as him and that the other guy is jewish "I mean come on, really who are you going to pick?"

In other new Conor had a brilliant t-shirt idea to sell in the UK-
"I want to be Prince Charles' tampon for a day"